Rough Music by Patrick Gale

My reading is far outpacing my writing and posting of reviews on this blog.  I refuse to apologise.  But I absolve to correct this imbalance of priorities and set myself the task of catching up.  No promises though!

Patrick Gale is quite simply one of my favourite authors.  I love everything he writes so it will come as no surprise when I tell you that I loved this novel.  I loved the way I got sucked into the idyllic setting and the idea of a perfect, happy childhood.  I was sucked into believing everything the characters believed.

Mr Gale writes clear exquisite detail without losing his readers in long wandering, aimless paragraphs of prose when your eyes glaze over.  Instead he skips the through his plots and before you know it you are fully engaged in the outcome.

Will invites his parents to join him on a beach holiday not realising that he is about to step into a hornet's nest of powerful memories.  His mother suffers dementia.  Will is having an affair with his brother-in-law which he has tried and failed to end.  This could so easily have become all a bit of a soap opera as we travel back and forth in time to Julian's (Will's childhood name) messy childhood and Will's messier adulthood.

But it doesn't become melodramatic in the least.  Instead the story reminds us that we all have a bit of a mess inside of us and lived messy lives at various times.

Julian (aka Will), as a character, is not all that easy to like.  I never quite trust people who tell me they had a perfect childhood and have a perfect life.  I suspected all along that the reality would be revealed in time.

I was mildly annoyed with the stereotypical representation of Americans but I let that wash over me.

I highly recommend reading this book and gave it a 4 out of 5 stars on Goodreads.

River God and The Seventh Scroll by Wilbur Smith

 Not entirely sure what I am thinking.  Maybe I am not.

I read River God over a year ago but thought so little of it that I didn't even put a review of it on the blog.  Basically the premise of that novel was that one Egyptian eunuch slave, Taita, was responsible for inventing absolutely everything.

As if that wasn't enough to put me off, I then went and bought (at a second hand sale) the second in this Egyptian series.  Smith does the most unusual trick (sarcasm alert) of weaving a modern story in with an ancient story to help find an ancient buried/hidden treasure.  He further alienates me by putting his own previous novel and himself in the story.

Honestly,  I'm not sure why I picked up the second book when I thought the first one was so dire.  To make matters worse I think I've even picked up the third.  I might have bought them all at the same time.  At least that is the excuse I am going to use.  

You can read these books if you would like to fill your brain with loads of misinformation about the Egyptians.  Otherwise, I suggest you give them all a miss.  

Wonder if I will be able to resist the urge to read it?  God, I hope so.

Before I Met You by Lisa Jewell

Once again I am faced with a novel with two different story lines interwoven in alternating chapters where the characters have some sort of relationship in common but time goes back and forth.  It seems to be that this is the latest fashion for historical novels.  I'm not sure I am a fan.  I thought it was quite clever the first couple of these I read but now the novelty has worn off.

But it's not just the originality that has gone.  It is the inevitable fact that one story is more captivating than the other so you find yourself rushing through the chapters of one just to get to the chapters of the other.  So it is with Lisa Jewell's Before I Met You.

One plot line is based around 1920s SoHo London where the first world war has ended and Arlette's life as a member of a bohemian set of musicians and artists is just beginning.  Arlette falls in love with the most unlikely of men in the most unlikely of circumstances with the most tragic of endings.  This story line is filled with delicious details of a time and place that was new and fresh and young and free.  Women were granted freedoms previously unattainable.  The very fabric of British society was breaking down and irreversibly changing.  It was a fascinating time and I wanted to read this plot line endlessly.  The descriptions of the clothing was enough to fill my head with dreams of vintage clothing, complete with gloves, hats, and handbags

Regrettably, my joy was interrupted with the modern day plot line which has Arlette's grand daughter searching inexplicably to find a mysterious benefactor cited in her grandmother's will.  I guessed who the benefactor was about 50 pages into the novel which meant that half the book was a complete waste of time for me.  I didn't find any of the modern characters compelling and in fact found myself downright outraged by the rock star falls for nanny (but there's a better man) storyline.  Surely, Arlette's story proved that this atrocious relationship was ridiculous.

I really wish Jewell would have simply told the story of Arlette and left it at that.

I gave this book 4 out of 5 stars.

Jasmine Nights by Julia Gregson

I received a proof copy of this book ages ago.  I put off reading it because I thought her previous novel, East of the Sun, was a prequel.  After reading that book and liking it well enough, I felt adequately prepared to move on to Jasmine Nights.  Imagine my surprise when I discovered that Jasmine Nights had absolutely nothing to do with East of the Sun.  

Jasmine Nights is set during the second World War and I must admit to suffering some literary WWII fatigue.  It seems that lately there is a glut of it on my bookshelves.  And regrettably, this book offered little additional insight although it did offer an alternative perspective.

The setting of North Africa  and the characters of a band of wartime entertainers, eg singers, magicians, comedians  was new to me.  However, the shattered families, the devastated countries, and the pursuit of a few moments of passion in the midst of chaos and hopelessness, is nothing new.  A singer falling in love with a soldier, stolen nights of tenderness, and a suitably romantic ending make this novel, ultimately, a bit cliched.

I enjoyed the plot and the timing of the novel.  I was compelled to keep reading. So all is not lost.  but the characters failed to jump off the pages and capture my imagination.  

I also enjoyed the place of the novel.  Cairo, in fact all of North Africa, is a place I dream of visiting but avoid because I am apprehensive about the security situation.  So instead I read about it.  Or watch films.  You can never see Casablanca too many times.  The difficulty of travelling in wartime is brought alive in the novel's pages.  In fact, Gregson does a superb job conveying the sense of despair and tragedy of the area.  

She also shines a very bright light on the unsavoury business and characters of wartime.  I loved the various eccentrics who populate the troupe of entertainers, all carrying the burden of past secrets, all running away from something or to something.  They were savvy, desperate, and very resourceful.

I will read more of Julia Gregson because I think she is a good writer.  I just hope she uses her imagination more when it comes to choosing a time.

I give this novel 3 stars out of 5.

Moth Smoke by Mohsin Hamid

I picked this book up based on a effusively glowing recommendation from fellow (but usually absent) book group member, Moray Barclay.  We had read the author's previous book, The Reluctant Fundamentalist to great acclaim.  I loved that book and usually, although not always, if I like one author's books with so much passion, I like other books of their.  Notable exceptions include Ian McEwan (Solar, among others, sucked), John Grisham (he's lost his edge), Dan Brown (all down hill from DaVinci), and Louis de Bernieres (should have never written another book after Captain Corelli's Mandolin).

I still am not sure how I feel about this book.  Similar to his previous book, I was never sure where the story was going or even what was happening as it was happening.  Unlike the previous book, nothing came together in the end.

Maybe I'm complaining for all the wrong reasons.  This isn't a happy book.  It tells a depressing story of unemployment, duplicity, loss of self esteem and identity, and ultimately loss of hope.  So when I finished reading it, I didn't feel any better for having read it.  When I read The Reluctant Fundmentalist, at least I felt that I walked away with an education.  This book just made me feel complete and utter despair, which might just be the point.

This book has the same laconic style of writing as his other novels.  Things happens quickly but you feel like you are watching it all in slow motion.  You can see the crash is going to happen and you are hoping for redemption at the end but life isn't like that.  And one thing Hamid does very well is not mess with the brutal reality of life in Pakistan.

I like reading books that are about subjects that I don't get much exposure to.  One of the reasons The Kite Runner is still one of my favourite books of all time is the fact that I had never heard that story before.  It was truly original.  I feel the same way about Moth Smoke.  

I gave this a 3 out of 5 stars.  This would be an excellent book group choice. In fact, please please please, would a book group pick this up and let me know what they think about it?

The One-Hundred Year Old Man Who Climbed Out of the Window and Disappeared by Jonas Jonasson

This book wins the prize for having the longest title of the year.  It also wins the prize for the book whose title I can never remember correctly.  But none of that matters because if you ask anyone who reads if they've read the "one-hundred year old man" book, they will know exactly which book you are talking about.  And they will, in all likelihood, have read it.  And it is a distinct probability that, like, me, they will have found it an entirely entertaining experience, as did I.

In a series of highly improbable but no less hilarious coincidences and happy meetings, a man with not many days left in his life, enjoys his remaining days and enlivens the lives of a few other no less deserving eccentric characters who cross his path.

Even more remarkable is the astonishing Forest Gump like influence his past had on key events in history spanning the entire globe and affecting just about every significant international crisis along the way.

This book was fun because it allowed a bit of a reminder of my history over the lasts 100 years whilst I was laughing out loud to the hysterical situations this mild mannered individual found himself in and then dug himself out of.

I gave this book a 4 out of 5 stars and would recommend this to anyone over the age of 45.  Any younger and the history lessons might just fly right over their head.

Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

I understand this is the debut novel from Gillian Flynn.  I can only say, I hope she writes the next one quickly because I can't wait to see if this is a one off.

I was completely mesmerized and captivated by this story. I couldn't put it down. I was tempted every 20 pages or so to jump to the end and read the last 5 pages. I just had to know how it ended. I resisted the temptation and am very glad I did.

I hated both the main characters, Nick and Amy, so much so that I wanted them both to come to a sticky end.  But the same way you slow down at the scene of a road traffic accident, I just had to keep reading.  How was this all going to end?  Who was going to win the ultimate battle of the psychopaths?

In the immediate aftermath of finishing the book, the ending spoilt everything that came before it. I'm not going to give it away and I have tried and tried to come up with a better ending. I don't have a good suggestion although I have to say it would have been anyone but the one it got.

And then I slept on it. And now I realise it was the perfect ending. For the perfect psychopath(s). I wouldn't change a thing.

As for Flynn's next novel, will she be able to match the wildly unpredictable and clever ending.  Or was this the most original idea she will ever have?  I'm hoping for the former.

I gave this book 5 out of 5 stars and highly recommend it for books groups.  Ours were evenly divided between those who loved the ending and those who hated the ending.  No punches were thrown.

The Snow Child by Eowyn Ivey

This was one of  book group choices for February, which is quite fitting given that we had freezing temperatures and a wee bit of snow during the month.  I picked both the books for February so I might be biased here but live with it.

I really enjoyed the language of the book.  Ivey used everyone of the sensory perceptions available to bring that harsh landscape to life.  I could hear the snow crunching under my feet as I traipsed through the forest.  I could feel the snow on my face as the brutal winter broke.  I could smell the decay of autumn leaves as summer came to a staggering halt. I could touch the feathers and the rough clothing.  I could taste the monotony of the first sparse winter meals.

I got lost in the beauty of the challenges faced.  But then I got lost in the story. 

I loved the characters of Jack and Mabel.  I even loved their names.  I thought the speed of the plotting was very well done despite the descriptive language.  I couldn't stop reading.

And then it all ended.  And that's where the troubles began.  We had a lengthy debate at book group about whether the entire book is a fairy tale or is Faina a real girl.  If she is real, how does she survive all alone.  If she isn't real, how does she get married?

Seldom does a child bring a couple together, usually because the first years of a child's life are difficult on a marriage   But if that child came to a marriage at a later age, could she really bring them closer together?  Or would that have happened anyway out of necessity in the harsh reality of the Alaskan wilderness?

I like the book if I imagine it as a fairy tale.  I like it a lot less if it is not meant to be a fairy tale.

I give this book 4 out of 5 stars but with a strong recommendation for book groups.  There is a lot to discuss. 

Deal Breaker by Harlan Coben

In the last 18 months, I have devoured all the Reacher novels so I needed to start looking for a suitable replacement or be left as one of those sad souls who pine away for the release of the next installment standing in a drizzly rain outside a book shop.  No, that will never be me.  Well, maybe perhaps not ever.  But certainly not for Jack Reacher.

My search introduced me to Myron Bolitar, who isn't nearly as intimidating or good looking as Jack Reacher.  He is not ex military nor can he kill anyone with one strategically placed strike from his hands of retaliation.  Myron is not sexy.  Even is name is a bit of a damp squid.

In fact, most unlikely, Myron is a sports agent who repeatedly finds himself in the middle of murder scenes.  This sports agent business is far more dangerous than you might imagine.  And far more entertaining.

Deal Breaker is the first in the series and, similar to the Child series, these are easy to read, a bit like opening a packet of crisps and eating the whole bag in one sitting.  Christian Steele is a rookie quarterback (this is American football, people) and a big client for Myron's struggling business.  All the people around Christian keep disappearing or getting themselves killed.  In an attempt to salvage his client's career and secure his 10% commission, Myron swoops in to limit the damage to Steele's reputation and put an end to the killings.

Myron doesn't have the sex appeal of Jack Reacher but he does have some side kicks who provide some comic relief.  The good guys and the bad guys were a bit more clear cut than in a Reacher tale.  And Coben doesn't have as great a story to tell as Child.  His first novel was published when he was 26.  He's won numerous awards in his genre.  His novels tend to go straight in at number 1 on the New York Times best seller list.    I gotta be on to something good here, no?

I'm looking forward to reading some more books in the series and seeing how Myron develops as a character.  I may get bored very quickly with the whole sports angle but I'll give it a go.  I gave this book a 3 out of 5 stars just for its originality in characterisation.

East of the Sun by Julia Gregson

Ages and ages ago I was given an advance copy of Jasmine Nights by Julia Gregson which has just been chosen as one of Richard & Judy's Book Club reads.  Somehow I got it into my head that Jasmine Nights was the sequel to East of the Sun and my mild case of OCD means that I could never ever possibly read a sequel before I read its prequel.  Which sent me to the book story.  I know, lame excuse but one has to do what one has to do.

East of the Sun tells the story of a select few from the fishing fleets: the groups of young women who would leave their families in search of marriage to a suitable officer in the British Military during the last gasp of the British Raj.

The novel centres on 3 women in their 20s each at different stages of their quest:  Rose has become engaged to a military officer whilst he was on a brief period of leave.  She hardly knows him and knows even less about the nature of marriage.  Victoria has her heads in the clouds and is taken advantage of by every Tom, Dick and Harry (excuse the pun).  She has barely a penny to her name and her chaperon is wholly unsuitable for helping her find her way.  Finally, Viva, who has misrepresented her qualifications, experience, and motivation as a chaperon.  And although Viva's last intention is to find a husband, she does yearn for the excitement and independence that she imagines life in India as a single woman in the 1920s might bring her.  That wouldn't have been my destination of choice in those days but to each their own.

Thrown in for good measure are innumerable eccentric and exotic characters which is exactly how I imagine the British expatriates behaved during this time.  Perhaps I read too many books.  One of the most troubling characters in the book is Guy Carver who is clearly afflicted with what would today be diagnosed as either bipolar or schizophrenia, both serious mental health illnesses which have many different and effective methods of treatments today.  However, in India in the 1920s it is fair to say, he was not treated very sympathetically although Gregson barely touches on this area.  She could have developed him as a character much more effectively.  I think this would have been a very different book had she done so.

Also, the quest for Viva's trunk is somewhat disappointing.  It takes Viva ages to go on the search and when she does go the result is more than a mild let down.  I suppose that's the point.  Viva had these unrealistic expectations of all of her questions being answered by the contents only to find that mold and decay had eaten up any and everything that was there.  And, in fact, nothing there would have brought her peace anyway.  It was a clever device to keep the plot moving but was ultimately disappointing.

This is the first book that I've read about this time period although several others are now on my To-Read list and after reading this they have made it to the top of the pile.  I gave this book a 4 out of 5 stars.  I think most of you would really enjoy this.

Jack Reacher by Lee Child

I can't help myself.  The Jack Reacher series by Lee Child is candy floss for the brain and whilst trying to juggle the demands of the Christmas holidays, I find his stories irresistible.  They are like breath mints in between courses of heavier literary duty.

I read 3 in the series in December, 61 Hours, Worth Dying For, and The Affair, which are number 14, 15, and 16 respectively.  They take little more than a day to power through.  Similar to John Grisham books, the plots are very similar in every book, as are the characters.

Jack Reacher is an ex-military, hottie nomad who travels the United States of America, usually by bus but sometimes by hitchhiking or stealing cars.  He most likely seduces the one beautiful woman in the story.  He always kicks the shit out of the baddies to save the small town/helpless locals from some rampant corruption.

There are no surprises.  You always know how it is going to end.  The locations change and I do love the fact that Lee Child is a Brit from Coventry, UK but has probably travelled to and stayed for a time in all 50 states just to get the local dialect and culture just right.

He's not going to win any prizes for high brow literature but I don't care.  They are fun. They make me believe that some stranger is out there fighting to take out the baddies without a care for the justice system or unrestrained violence. Of course, I wouldn't want my real world to be like this but a fantasy is always useful.

SIDE NOTE:  Tom Cruise has been woefully miscast in the role of Jack Reacher.  No, I haven't seen the film and I doubt that I will for several reasons:

1. Reacher is 6'5".  Cruise is 5'7" in heels.
2. Reacher has a 50-inch chest and weighs between 210 and 250 pounds (100–115 kg).  Cruise does not.  Not even close.
3. Reacher has ice-blue eyes and dirty blond hair. Cruise does not.
4. Reacher has very little body fat, and his muscular physique is completely natural. He is exceptionally strong but is not a good runner. Reacher is strong enough to break a man's neck with one hand and kill a villain with a single punch to the head or chest. In a fight against a 7 foot, 400 lb steroid-using thug, Reacher was able to lift his opponent into the air and drop him on his head.  Cruise does not and cannot not.  Not even with Hollywood magic.
5. Reacher is supposed to be ruggedly good looking.  Cruise looks like a baby.
6. Reacher is supposed to have been emotionally and physically scarred by his time as an MP in the US Army.  Cruise hasn't had a day of hard graft in his life and no amount of makeup is going to make him look like he has.
7. There are a million other better casting choices.  OK, maybe not a million but I can name a few here:   a) Ray Stevenson, b)Viggo Mortenson - my personal favourite, c) Russell Crowe, d) Josh Holloway.  I should become a casting agent.

Instead I will let Reacher live on in my imagination.  And let the world be a better place with Reacher in it.  However, Child's betrayal of millions of fans who have spent roughly £7.99 on each of the 16 installments, and thus, making him a very rich man, will not be tolerated by this fan.  I will not buy another book by Lee Child.  I will do my best to avoid his pseudonyms.  My love affair with Jack Reacher is over.  Finished.  Finito. Done.  Complete.  The End.

The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller

Oh, how I wish I had studied the classics.  The tales of the Greek Gods are filled with violence, jealousy, superstition, romance and sex.  What more does one need for a good story?  To start with, a command of this indecipherable language would be helpful.  Not Greek necessarily, but the poetry and structure in which The Iliad and The Odyssey were written have left them out of the reach of typical readers like myself, who decided a degree in computer science would be a far more useful.

One would think these stories, having been told for thousands of years, do not need to be told again.  Ah, but you would be wrong.  The Iliad weighs in at a mere 482 pages but the text can be somewhat (dare I say it?) incomprehensible to those mere mortals amongst us.   Put the same stories in the talented hands of Madeline Miller, these heroes and their tales of war come alive with their faults and flaws, love and lust, courage and foolishness.

The Song of Achilles provides a beautiful account of the alleged love story and sexual relationship between Patroclus and Achilles while at the same time painting a brutal scene of the war and conflict that dominated their world.  And all in a language that I can read, enjoy and understand rather effortlessly.  The homosexual relationship between Patroclus and Achilles was never explicit in the Iliad and the nature of the word love can mean many different things:  love for a child, love for a friend, love for a lover, the act of loving, etc. But there is no such ambiguity in Miller's novel.  Miller embraces whole heartily the sexual nature of their relationship.  But there is more to this story than the sex.  The violence of the war, the disregard for the value of life, the egotistical drive to be the best:  the themes dominate the Greek myths and Miller makes it all fascinating as well as accessible.

I found the novel intense and engaging (read "I couldn't put the bloody book down").  The tender love between the lovers developed over decades.  The grief ravaged me and I cried when Patroclus died and Achilles wept inconsolably.  I felt his rage and commitment to revenge.  I don't doubt for one second, after reading this novel, that Achilles loved Patroclus with every fibre of his being, in every way possible.  The summoning of such anger would be difficult to imagine without the existence of such love. 

This wins the honour of being in my Top 10 2012 Reads and it gets 5 out of 5 stars from me.  If you haven't read it, do so.  Now!

Mister Pip by Lloyd Jones

I have a confession to make.  I am not a fan of Dickens.  Yes, I hear all the sharp intakes of breath.  How can I admit to such heresy?  Easy, I say.  I have tried and tried to read several of his novels and I have simply found them incomprehensible.  Bleak House and Oliver Twist top the list of books I  have failed to finish despite repeated attempts.  I am well aware that this means some of you may never trust another book review I write.  I am willing to take this risk.  I doubt my life will be ruined any more than it already is.

It does mean, however, that I may  have enjoyed this novel more if I had read and committed to memory the tome, Great Expectations.  It would appear that everyone else has.  Mister Pip was shortlisted for the Man Booker Prize in 2007 and was the runner-up for the Richard & Judy Best Read of the Year 2008.  Not sure what Oprah thought of it but she probably loved it.

Thankfully, I don't put too much stock in these literary prizes, that is until I win one.  I started reading this novel several times but it always made its way back into my pile to "to-read" as pile when I failed to make it beyond the first 30 pages or so.

The novel is set on a fictional but all too familiar tropical island beseiged by the horrors of an inexplicable civil war.  The native inhabitants of the island check every box on a list of cliches.  Mr. Watts is the only white inhabitant and has decided, I presume, that this qualifies him to be the teacher.  Regrettably, the only text book available is a copy of Great Expectations, which does at some point go missing entirely. His star pupil is a young, impressionable but questionably bright girl named Matilda.

I found the story mildly entertaining and Jones' prose is, at times, beautiful, although poetic might be stretching it a bit.   The savagery and randomness of the civil war is told with the same lyrical tone as the uplifting and heartwarming rhthym as Matilda's quest for knowledge and the truth.  I was, and will continue to be, dismayed by Mr Watt's cotinued presence on the island.

I gave this novel 3 out of 5 stars, mostly for originality in plot and the use of language.  But there is a pile of books unread next to my bed and I wish I had chosen something else.

The Girl You Left Behind by JoJo Moyes

Over the Christmas holidays I gave my final push towards my goal of reading 60 books in 2012.  I exceeded my target by 9 books!  Woo Hoo!  Now I get to tell you all about them.

This was the first book by Jojo Moyes that I had read and, to be honest, if it hadn't have been a free gift in my Red Network Event gift bag, I probably wouldn't have bought it.  Which would have been a huge mistake.

Set in the First World War, this book tells the story of a French artist and his muse who are torn apart by the horrors wreaked upon northern France and its citizens during the invasion and occupation by German Forces.  Edward Lefevre leaves his wife, Sophie, to fight on the front lines but Sophie is left with her own more subtle but nevertheless wretched battles to fight in their small village.

Interwoven is the story of Liv, who has also lost her husband and is suffering in the depths of her grief.  When a precious painting, a gift from her late husband, is suspected to be a stolen artifact from the war, Liv must pick herself up and fight to keep her most prized possession.

Other than Birdsong by Sebastian Faulks, I have read few novels about the first World War.  I simply find them too harrowing.  This tale was no different.  But sometimes we must read that which frightens us.  Enjoyed is the wrong word to use to describe how I felt when reading about the suffering of the village and Sophie, in particular. I was moved by her dedication to Edward and compelled to keep reading whenever her story was on the page.

Liv's story on the other hand was less engaging.  As a character, I didn't relate to her at all.  Specifically, the relinquishment of her total life to her husband's choices was annoying.  I found her story tedious and read through the chapters with her story as quickly as possible.

The ending is predictable but satisfying, especially the fate of Edward and Sophie.  I enjoyed this novel tremendously which is why it gets 4 out of 5 stars. The only thing holding back that coveted last star is that I felt more time could have been spent developing a more plausible plot and likable character in the modern day storyline.

Bad Angels by Rebecca Chance

I was giving my brain a rest from the trauma of The Quincunx and I think I've strayed into a brain coma.  This is, however, not an entirely bad thing.

 

I've never read anything by Rebecca Chance depsite her having written and published no less than six books, all featuring a CFM shoe (ask your parents if you don't know what CFM is)  and sparkly jewelery on the cover.  I picked up this copy at the blogging event that Simon & Schuster hosted a month or so ago.  And, hey, it was free.  Oh, and it was loads of fun.

 

This is truly a bonk fest book.  Loads of sex.  Did I meantion it had loads of sex?  Loads!  Hot sex.

 

The story is actually quite funny and entertaining.  The endings are all happy and joyful.  And to pur the icing on the cake, it even takes place during the Christmas festive season in London featuring caricatures of all our favourtie Daily Mail characters.

 

Melody is an up and coming actress who has spoint her chances of being a serious actress when Hollywood calls and transofrms her into a plastic surgery parody of herself.  Jon is a former CIA agent turned professional assassin trying to start his life over by erasing all traces of his former self including a whole new face using reconstructive surgery.  Aniela is the nurse in residence trying to care for both of them whilst falling head over heels in lust with Jon.  Grigor is an exiled Russian oligarch, who also owns a London-based football team but in deep trouble when he leaves his first wife for a young bimbo. Hell hath no fury like a Russian oligarch's first wife. Andy is the gay concierge at Limehouse Reach, a swanky apartment complex on the banks of the Thames, where all these lives collide for fun and festive frolics.  Oh, and lots of bonking.

 

This is a "curl up in front of the fire with a big duvt and get lost without having to think for one minute" or perhaps a "sit on a sun lounger and get fried" type of book.  I laughed out loud more times than I would like to admit.  And enjoyed it more than I would like to admit.

 

For sex scenes much better than Fifty Shades, you should really be reading Rebecca Chance!

Beautiful Disaster by Jamie McGuire

We've all fallen for the bad boy at one time or another.

There are quite a few similarities between the Fifty Shades trilogy and Beautiful Disaster.  Abby Abernathy is a perfect university freshman student who wears cardigans to her classes and has kept her virginity intact.  Before long, Abby is attracted to Travis, the fiercely toned, fabulously great looking and fully covered in tattoos bad boy.  Without a lot of convincing, Abby gives up her virginity to the charming, man slut.

There is a lot of violence, not in the S&M bondage type but of the boxing type.  Travis boxes in amateur, underground matches to make money to pay for his education.  This apparently is quite the turn on for Abby.  Travis is equally attracted to Abby when he sees his blood covering her cardigan.

Of course, Abby isn't as perfect as she first appears.  She has a wretched childhood growing up with an unstable and dysfunctional father and alcoholic mother.  She has run away to university to escape their grip on her both emotional and financially. 

And this is where I start to have massive problem with the story.  Abby seems to be quite sensible unless Travis is involved.  He is very controlling and whilst she appears to fight with him every time he misbehaves, she always forgives him.  She goes back to him time and time again convincing herself that they are so wrong for each other that they might be just perfect for each other.  Now, what kind of logic is that?  I'll tell you what kind of logic that is.  That is the logic that gets battered wives killed by their husbands when they don't leave or prosecute them for their violent tendencies.

If I look beyond this appalling message I still struggle to find good things about the book. 

Abby was inconsistent as a character.  First she didn't drink.  then the reader finds out that she can drink15 shots of tequila in one night without dying of alcohol poisoning.  This turns her boyfriend on.  Her first boyfriend was a preacher's son who now runs a gambling casino in Vegas.  Really?  Uh, I don't think so.  If he was thrown in to make Travis jealous again, we didn't need it.  We knew he was jealous.  Having Parker give Abby a diamond tennis bracelet after 1 week of dating is absurd.  Do you know how much those cost?  Why didn't she just sell that to pay off at least part of Mick's debt?  It appeared not to even occur to her. 

I loved the whole teenage angst of breaking up and getting back together again and again and again. I remember those days!   I loved the character of America.  Shepley could have been developed a bit more.  I didn't understand his fierce loyalty to Travis.

So here I've just rubbished the book but I still gave it three stars?  That's because the plotting is divine.  I couldn't stop reading it.  The writing is way better than Fifty Shades.  Actually, so is the sex.  There's a little bit of the Twilight series thrown in for good measure but without the vampires and werewolves.

The tattoo at the end is absurd.  Mrs. Maddox?  She couldn't come up with something better than that?

If you want more Abby and Travis you can relive the whole thing from Travis' point of view by reading Walking Disaster.  I think I'll skip it.

I, Coriander by Sally Gardner

Set in London during the upheaval of the Reformation of the seventeenth century, this novel blends fairy tale with historical fiction, not entirely successfully.  I kept wondering is this a children's book?  Is this fantasy?  The truth is it's a little bit of all of those and, therefore, none of those.

Coriander is a young girl who has inherited some sort of magical powers from her mother, who was some sort of Fairy Land Princess.  These powers include the ability to be transported to magical lands and live for three years locked in a chest without food or water, and maybe bring the dead back to life.

I found the histroical landmarkers and period details well researched and fascinating.  Most of the trouble started when we left London and headed for this other place.  The story felt disjointed in those moments.

But then, the lyrical and beautiful prose would carry me away and I would forget about the depravity of those historical times.  That would soon come to an abrupt halt and I crashed into a wall trying to find my way back into the story as Coriander struggled to find her way through the streets of London.

It does have a fairy tale ending, which I have to say I was pleased about.  I hang my feminist head in shame and fear for the future of my daughter. 

I gave this book 3 stars but I have also given it to a 13 year old daughter of a friend of mine and have asked for her perspective.  As I am probably not the target audience I htought it would be only fair to give her a chance to speak.  She has generously agreed to provide a book review for me when she is done so stay tuned!

Stars Explained

I saw an author on Twitter the other day very upset that she had received a three star review.  My initial reaction was that three stars isn't all that bad of a rating.  In fact, in my system, three is a pretty good rating

 

5 Stars ***** - Outstanding!  I want to own a hardback copy of this book.  I will read everything else the author has written and I will re read this book throughout the years.  It will have a pride of place on my book shelves and I will tell everyone I meet about it.  It touched my heart and stays with me long after I have finished it.

 

4 Stars **** - Great!  I really enjoyed this story, the chracters, the place and/or the time.  I will probably keep a copy of the book on my shelves.  I will recommend it to friends if I know it is something they would enjoy.  I will read a few other things an author has written because I might

 

3 Stars *** - Good!  This is an enjoyable read, perhaps funny, perhaps intriguing.  Maybe I didn't like a character, or the story dragged, or the prose was sloppy, or the plot had some holes in it.  But I liked it enough to give it away to someone else.  I might read other titles by this author.

 

2 Stars - **  Didn't Enjoy. -  Probably finished but found it a struggle.   Few things came to together and this book didn't touch me in any way.  Probably won't read other titles by this author. 

 

1 Star * - Hated!  Probably didn't finish.  Probably threw this across the room.  Probably ranted about how this book got published.  Probably threw this book into the recycle bin.

 

I am reading my 60th book of 2012 and having done a wee bit of uber scientific data analysis, I can honestly say it is way more difficult to gt a 1 or 2 out of me than a 5 or 4.  Maybe I just know how to pick my books.  Or maybe there are just more good books than bad books out there.  Or maybe I'm an old softie.  Whatever, my analysis shows a nearly perfect statistically accurate bell curve.

 

Please do not be offended if you get three stars.  And if you get 1 star you might want to consider that just because I didn't like it someone else probably will.

 

NB:  I use Goodreads to keep track of everything I read.  If you're not already my friend on Goodread, please be my friend!

The First Last Kiss by Ali Harris

Those who read my book reviews regularly know that in between my heavy, mind boggling, brain frying fiction, I have to throw in a couple easy reads.  They are like palate cleansers in between courses when eating a rich, extravagant (read ludicrously expensive) meal.  These books aren't any less enjoyable necessarily but they don't tend to stick with me after I've read them.

I met the author, Ali Harris, at an event hosted by Simon and Schuster, and read her first book, Miracle on Regent Street, first.  Because that's the kinda girl I am.  First things first.  I wasn't looking forward to reading her second novel after the first simply because I had really liked Ali but hadn't really liked her first book and I didn't want to write something not great about her second book.

 

I knew, however, that my integrity as a book reviewer meant I had to take the bad with the good. 

 

The book uses a unique device of heading each chapter in one of three different ways:

1. Time of day on one particular day
2. A type of kiss
3. A moment in the past identified by a marker from a DVD or video tape, eg FF or REW or PLAY

Chapter types 1 and 2 tend to be short, very short, but help set the scene for the type 3 chapters.  This approach captured my imagination straight away.  The characters then captured my heart.

We meet Molly when she is young, lonely, trying to find herself and her place in the world.  Not an entirely likable character, Molly grows and learns to love herself and love others.  Who amongst us hasn't been there?

Ryan is the perfect Essex boy who spots the lovable Molly underneath all her false goth bravado and slowly chips away at that chip on her shoulder and the ice in her heart.

 

Casey is Molly's flawed BFF and I recognised an old friend of mine straight away in her character.  the novel is peppered with exquisitely drawn parents, in-laws and co-workers who all season our own love lives.

 

But this isn't a simple girl hates boy, girl loves boy, happily ever after story.  About halfway through the story takes a left turn and heads you down a path I never saw coming.

 

I'm not afraid to admit it.  I sobbed.  The pages of my book are crinkled where my tears fell.  At times I couldn't read for my blurry eyes.  But I wouldn't put the book down.  My husband was alarmed when upon returning home finding me in the same place he had left me hours before only now surrounded with piles of used tissues and the tears still flowing down my cheeks.

 

OK, I'm a sap for a good story.  And a good cry.

 

I finished this book over a week ago and it is still inside my head.  My husband kissed me the other day and I found myself thinking about hanging on to that moment, that tenderness, that feeling, forever.

 

Read this book and you will never kiss or be kissed again in quite the same way.  It wins 5 stars from me. 

 

NOTE:  Publication date for this book is January 2013 so you can't give it as a Christmas gift.  Feel free to preorder!

Miracle on Regent Street by Ali Harris

My brain needed some reading candy after the grind of The Quincunx and this lovely little book was just the ticket. 

Evie Taylor is stuck in life working the stockroom of a fading gem of a department store, Hardy's, after her life is devastated when her boyfriend, Jamie, leaves her.  She is drab and invisible.  But when the future of Hardy's is threatened with the takeover by the sleek competition, she assembles a merry band of elves from the store's other downtrodden misfits to transform it into a vintage wonderland.  she does all this whilst being courted by two very deserving men.  Which one is going to win the girl and will the store be transformed in time to escape a hostile takeover?

Like a bag of candy floss, the story was very sweet in places, even corny.  I jarred a bit at the stolen line from Pretty Woman when Joel, the suave, debonair, and impossibly perfect American, orders the entire Claridge's breakfast menu when he doesn't know what she wants for breakfast.  It would have been ok if the movie had been referenced, but it wasn't.

But there isn't a more perfect love story to get you in the mood for Christmas.  I loved all the references to the way London is transformed at Christmas time and I wished for a real store similar to Hardy's so I could go there and do all my Christmas shopping.  I particularly enjoyed the critical remark of Regent Street being decorated like one big Disney advert.

I really liked all the characters who worked in the store, even if they were a bit cliched.  My favourite characters were the Polish cleaners and their accent.  Even the names the author chose for the characters were perfectly ludicrous. I found myself speaking their parts out loud.

There was some timing issues like how Evie was able to get to work at 7 am when she was helping her sister, Delilah, get them ready for school.  I don't know about you, but my children get up for school at that time.  There is no way they would be up before 6 am.  I also found the selfish, self-centeredness and self absorbed side of Evie hard to swallow when she cared so much for everyone at the store.  That was of course all explained at the end but it did feel a little too neat and tidy of a sweep under the rug of such brutal treatment of her sister.

Also, the throwaway remark about her sister being diagnosed with depression but still doing a Christmas dinner was caustic to someone who suffers from depression and knows that heating up a pizza is hard work with in the throes of such a debilitating mental illness.

But do NOT let any of that stop you from reading this novel if what you are looking for is something, sweet, short and light with a happy ending all tied up nicely with a bow.  Especially over the upcoming holidays.  It would make a perfect stocking stuffer for that special woman in your life!