Friday 10 August 2007


What is the one piece of advice I wish I'd been given as a young woman? Not that I would have listened much I don't think....depends on who was giving. I certainly wasn't listening to my mom at this stage of the game! She could have told me I was on fire and I would have ignored her. Do all mothers and daughters have a phase like this?

The on piece of advice I wish I had been given loud and clear was that very few decisions in life are permanent. As a matter of fact, in my 43 years I've only made 1 decision that was irreversible: having children. Once you become a mother, you are a mother for life. You can guess I don't have any tattoos but nowadays even those are a bit erasable....sort of, kind of, ok not really. So, tattoos and children.

Everything else can pretty much be done over. But no one told me that. I stressed and procrastinated making decisions because I was so afraid of making the wrong decision. And I wouldn't be able to undo or do over.

Now I know this just isn't true.

If you get the wrong degree in university, go back and get a post graduate degree in something else. Or do night courses. Or train on the job as a volunteer. I know loads of doctors who studied to be lawyers first go round.

If you take the wrong job, quit.

If you book the wrong holiday, grab a quick flight to somewhere else. Or change hotels. Or do more research or get recommendations from a trusted source next time.

If you order the wrong food ask someone to swap. Or ask the waiter to bring you something else. You might have to pay twice but at least you're eating what you want to eat.

If you by the wrong thing, take it back. Or donate it to a charity shop.

If your dating the wrong man, STOP! If you marry the wrong man, divorce him. Hopefully, you don't undertake this decision lightly and give it much careful consideration but ultimately this can be undone.

Now hopefully, you don't make many bad decisions. If you do maybe you need to slow down your decision process.

But I wish someone had told me, very few decisions in life are for keeps. It would have meant I wouldn't have been so afraid of complete and utter failure for so long and been paralyzed at every turn that I might take the wrong road. It took me well into my 30s before I learned this!

Now I believe, when I come to a fork in the road take a road. Any road. Read the signage and know a little bit about where each is going to take you but pick one and just get a move on. You can always turn back or take a short cross through the woods if you find you don't like where you're headed.


Janell said...

Congratulations on being nominated for best blog about stuff. Do you know what page you are on so we can vote? Or what do we enter in the searchbox? I got no results on either your name or blog address?

cdroses said...

I answered all of the questions, from Janell's. Thought I'd better check out the original source! lol
What wonderful advice! You are right about being able to change just about every aspect of your life. As for tattoos, if it's not one that no longer "fits" your lifestyle, you can have it altered or have something tattooed over it. Yes, I have two and plan on one or two more. :) (I'm sure my mom will just love hearing that part!)